Went for a ride.

Beautiful day for it, and we've had several in a row now. Somehow I've managed not to go for too many rides, but today I did. Not very far, not for very long...I started lifting at the gym yesterday, doing Joe Friels workout, and I didn't want to do a terribly long ride the first day after starting a new workout. Makes sense, right? Anyways, nice, easy ride, with the highlight being a 1/2 mile long, perfectly straight descent, down a 12% grade. I can usually hit around 45 mph, when motivated. The only problem is...there is an entrance/exit to a fairly busy highway about 3/4 of the way down, so you really have to be extra vigilent, or get squished. And predictably, wrecking the fun of going really fast, some dickhead was sitting on the side of the road, with his left hand blinker on, as though he were going to pull back out onto the road. He didn't, but I had to touch the brakes a couple times, and not pedal, to make sure I had the ability to get out of the way if he made his stupid move.

Waah, I could only do 37.5 mph, instead of 45. Waah.

Outside of that, it was nice. Even saw a couple other roadies, which is quite unusual in Sayreville...one on a Specialized, one on a Bianchi. Good to see other people out.

Anyways, that's all I got. I know it's not much...but I wanted to put something up, so that the ultra depressing post about Billy (RIP) wasn't the first thing you see upon coming to this blog...people were sending me email, making sure I wasn't going to kill myself. Sweet, but unnecessary. Thanks anyways, folks...

RIP Bill McLaughlin

I just found out today that my friend is dead.

I am devastated...I can't believe it.

I don't think it's any worse to him at this point, but to me, finding out he killed himself...cut through me in a way I'm not even going to attempt to put into metaphor.

My friend was in pain, and now he's dead.

We had lost touch...probably haven't spoken in two, maybe three years. He got transferred from the place that I used to pass on Rt 17, in Hasbrook Heights, to a place in Passaic that's off the beaten path, for me, so I didn't have the chance to drop in on him in a while. I had a cell phone die an ugly death in the washing machine, so I had lost his phone number...but I always said, no problem...I can get the number for the new place anytime. And I will...I'll call him one of these days, we'll catch up on old times, it'll be great. So today, just by chance, I passed the place that he got transferred to...I passed it before I really realized it, and decided to give a call, rather than stop in. Looked it up on the iPhone, called...

...and found out my friend was in pain...

...and now he's dead.

It's narcissistic to think that I could have made a difference, maybe...but I still can't help but think...I could have helped...if only I'd picked up the phone the day before he'd had enough.

Right now, I hate myself more with every breath I take.

I've done my fair share of fucking things up in my life...I've wrecked relationships, said stupid things to people I care about, lost good gigs, and jobs, and through it all, through the disappointment of doing damage to my own life, I've been able to remain upbeat, even happy. When I've done some good, even happier...but that's beside the point. When things are going wrong, I've always had the ability to let it roll off my back...I get depressed, just like anybody, but it passes reasonably quickly, and I find something to laugh at.

I am not one tenth the person Billy was. He was in the top five of the best human beings I've met in my life. He was relentless about being a good person, even when being just a little loose with it would have benefited him. And yet, in the end, it seems that he didn't have that ability to let it go the way I do...and I can't think of a greater injustice. The world was better off with him in it...and would be better off if I was able to trade myself for Billy...and give him what I have.

I'd do it in a second. In a fucking heartbeat.

Rest in peace, Billy. I thought of you as a brother that I would always meet up with again...I'm better off for having known you, and I'm sorry I wasn't there to help.

Sammy Faq

Sammy is a Blue and Gold Macaw

He is 3 years old (hatched 10/11/05)

Yes, he does talk.

No, I cannot make him talk on command.

He has approximately a 100 word vocabulary, so far.

He loves people food, he will eat almost anything you give him, although there are things that are harmful to him. He also loves nuts, a variety of seed, and chicken. Yes, chicken.

I do not know if he is male or female. It's impossible to tell, unless you do a DNA test. The test costs about $50, and I'll get it done one of these days. My money is on female.

Blue and Gold macaws generally cost about $1,500, but there are many more expenses, including cage, feed, vet bills, grooming, etc. Don't try to steal him, as you might get shot as you come through the door or window.

If he remains healthy, he will live about 70 years.

Yes, he does curse.

No, I will not put him on my head.

Todays ride, spinning

Had a good ride today, with a fellow Skylands member, a gentleman named Gene. Gene races, and apparently is pretty strong, so I didn't really know what to expect...I don't usually ride with racers, as they are always "training". Which I suppose I should be doing as well...but it's Thanksgiving, and I just wanted to go for a couple hour ride, have a little human contact, since all of my people are in North Carolina right now, and enjoy the scenery in north western NJ, my favorite part of the state. Still, there's always a little trepidation with this kind of thing, since I don't race, and don't know the guy...is he going to drop my ass like a hot potato? Am I going to be a lead weight that he feels obligated to shepherd along?

Gene had put out an email last night, through the club mailing list, saying he wanted to do a couple hour base ride, and I figured, why not. He said it would be about a 17 mph pace, on flat terrain (in NW Jersey?). Great! I can keep a 17 mph pace on flat terrain pretty easily. And gas prices are low, so it won't impact the old wallet much. So, the plan was in effect. I woke up at 7:30 (ride was at 10), got my shit together, I'm out the door with plenty of time to get there, and, as is my custom when trying to hook up with Skylands rides, I found a way to fuck it up. 10 minutes out of the house, I realized I left my cycling shoes behind. Goddamnit. Went back, got them, got back on the road, and the goddamn GPS was telling me my arrival time would be about 10:15.

Now, Garmin GPS units don't take into account how fast you're going, when it gives you your ETA. It takes into account your position, and the speed limits on your route. So...I knew I could make up time, and I did - I arrived at 10:05, averaging about 12-15 mph over the speed limit. Safe? For you, probably not. But I'm a hell of a driver.

I actually pulled into the parking lot of the school that we were meeting at, immediately after Gene, so it was all good from a time perspective; this may have been helped by me emailing him en route...iPhones are a wonderful thing. We went for a somewhat hilly ride (I know there ain't no flat ground in that area), 30 miles or so, in about 2 hours. So, a little slower than planned, but I don't think I held us back, I think that's just the way the ride unfolded. We did a lot of yakking along the way. Here's the route we took:

http://trail.motionbased.com/trail/activity/7210726

Pretty good ride, just the right length...my legs were starting to get a little heavy at the end. Made a new friend. What else can you ask for on Thanksgiving?

In other news, I took my first spin class the other day...I don't feel any gayer, but you never know....

It's been a while, eh?

Yeah, it's been a little while since I've posted. I've had an idea for an entry here and there, over the last month or two since I posted, but I procrastinate, and I just don't do it. For me, the time that I found easiest to post new entries was when I was actively training for the 3 State 3 Mountain Challenge, which was preceded the week before by the Tour de Lake Hopatcong. I haven't been actively training since then, for a variety of reasons, therefore I haven't been posting.

The biggest reason I haven't been training, I posted a couple entries about - my back. Now, it's not really that much better, and I still haven't seen a doctor for it (stupid? Yes, of course. That's kind of my thing), but I have found a way to make it much more managable...lots and lots of core work. Which is good and bad - I desperately need to tighten up the middle, and core work does make you a better cyclist. I hate doing ab/core work...that's the bad part, but this back issue will keep me doing it.

I've actually done a fair amount of riding this week, starting with a group ride with Skylands, and followed up the next day with the TdLH route. Funny thing - the same semi-mountainous route that is so much fun, when you're training for it, is not nearly as much fun when you're 15 lbs heavier (pure fat), and you've only been on the bike about eight times in the last two months. I mean, epic fail. I did the ride with my friend Garrett (who's also the mechanic at my LBS), who rides a single speed mountain bike up ridiculous grades on a regular basis, and it was just embarrassing. He kicked my ass up and down that route. Well...maybe not down, so much...the added weight makes me one hell of a descender.

Overall, though, I was pleased...simply finishing a course, especially a tough one, without getting shooting pains down into my leg, is an accomplishment in itself. A month and a half ago, I literally thought I was going to have to sell my bikes. It was that bad.

Awful condition, though, absolutely awful. I've gone on two semi-recovery rides since then, 31 mile rides (same loop both times) that I can do from my front door, keeping about a 17 mph pace, and it's weird...first of all, my heartrate still hasn't really come back down to my normal resting rate...it's about 10 bpm faster than it usually is; on these two rides, it was higher than normal, and while it comes back down to 100 fairly quickly, it takes forever to get down to 90. My lower back is a little sore, which is a concern, but hopefully, that's just because I haven't been on the bike nearly enough lately.

So from here on out, I'm considering myself back in training, full time. I'll be getting back into the gym, on a very regular basis, for core, pilates, yoga (it can't hurt, right?), some weight training, and possibly some spin classes as well. Hopefully, I can be under 200 lbs in about 5 months. I've taken a couple pics of myself, sans shirt...they aren't flattering. I'm picturing them being the "before" pics, in about six months.

Hey, what could possibly go wrong? ;-)

German broadcasters "not amused" with Armstrong's comeback plans

So, as unpopular an opinion as it may be, I'm pretty psyched that Armstrong is coming back. The way I see it, the only thing that realistically is going to stop him from winning Tour #8 is Contador's unreal climbing ability.

But...not everyone is as entertained as I am:

German television broadcaster ARD, which screens the Tour de France in that country in partnership with rival network ZDF, said Sunday it greets Lance Armstrong's planned comeback with skepticism.

Armstrong, who will be 37 on Thursday, announced last week that he plans to come out of retirement in a bid to win next year's Tour de France for the eighth time.

With Armstrong having been accused of doping in the past, Tour organizers have said he will be able to ride in the world's premier event next year if he complies with their strict rules in the fight against doping.

But the German broadcasters are "not amused.”

"For us, Armstrong is a piece of the past we don't want to see again," Rolf-Dieter Ganz, head of communications at ARD, told Sunday's edition of Die Welt.

Both ARD and ZDF stopped broadcasting the 2007 Tour de France during the event after German rider Patrick Sinkewitz failed a drugs test and are currently negotiating the contract to screen the 2009 Tour.

"When we renegotiate the contract, we will certainly sit round the table with the Tour director Christian Prudhomme and make it clear to him: we are not amused to hear about Armstrong's plans," said Ganz.

"The future belongs to young riders, certainly not to Armstrong's generation which we had hoped to have seen the last of."

With several riders having been caught doping during the competition in the last few years, the Tour's image has been damaged and the German broadcasters' attitude will carry some weight with the organizers as they look to gain important broadcasting revenue.

File this one right under "Fuck you, you humorless Kraut bastard". They aren't amused. Ok, file that one under "Who gives a fuck, you annoying, Holocaust camp running bastards".

A bit harsh? Maybe. But fuck them.

They aren't amused. His goddamn bloodwork is going to be online! You fucking half commie cunts used to spit in Armstrongs face, because Ulrich (a doper who got caught doping) couldn't beat him. He's 37, and has been out of the sport for several years. If you can't beat him now, he probably proved he never doped. So suck it up, you buying electricity from France motherfuckers.

Since when are Germans amused by anything? Other than, like, clocks, and warm beer.

Green country, my ass. You essentially outlaw nuclear power, then can't produce enough electricity, so you have to buy it from a country that gets it from...nuclear power! Amusing? You be the judge.

Landis is coming back, too. I can't wait til he shows Bernard "Conehead" Kohl how to time trial.

The Fat Guy is depressed, part II

So it seems I might have a damaged disk in my back. Great. All these years of dealing with tendon problems, I finally get past them (with the help of the greatest chiropractor/massage therapist/ART practitioner in the world), and now my lower back is damaged, permanently. I really don't know how I'm going to deal with this...I mean, I've worked hard, and spent a lot of time saving money to buy these ridiculously expensive bicycles, and now I have lower back pain if I ride more than ten miles. At about 15.5 mph.

I had been planning to slow down, anyways...I have/had this plan to just do LSD (long slow distance) rides, for the rest of the year. My goal was to not exceed a 15 mph average for the rest of the year, solely working on getting used to a higher constant cadence, in the 90-100 rpm range, and developing the soft/connective tissue in my knees and ankles, which I've had many problems with in the past. Then, hit the weights in the winter, while riding the rollers when it's too cold to go out, then start doing serious intervals, hill repeats, etc, next spring.

Why do I think I have a disk problem, you ask? Well, it started a couple months ago...my back just started hurting a little, down low, right at the top of my pelvis, so I found a good chiropractor, who understands the stresses a cyclist goes through, and made an appointment. Saw him twice, my back felt great, off I went. Couple months later, my back is bothering me again, but not badly, so I ignore it. Then, one morning I woke up, and my back was mangled. My girl later told me I was sleeping in a weird position (thanks for not giving me a shove, hon!), and it must have been a bizarre one, cause I've been twisted ever since. It mainly seems to bother me when I drive...which is unfortunate, cause I drive a ton. I get out of the car, and I'm bent over like an old man for 5-10 minutes. So I go see the chiro again, he breaks up some scar tissue in the muscle in my lower back, cracks me up, and off I go (planning to see him a week later). That was on a wednesday. The following friday, I went for a ride, in the Atlantic Highlands. If you look at the link, you'll see it was a slow average speed ride, but that's because there were lots and lots of 18-20% grades. On one of these grades my back went out on me a little, and I felt a pain shooting down into my leg. When I told the good doctor about it, he said that sounded symptomatic of a disk problem. Which, as you might imagine, is absolutely the last thing I wanted to hear. That was last wednesday, it's now Sunday, and my lower back is sore, but it's more soreness in the muscle, where he worked on me...which he told me to expect. Outside of that, no shooting pains, or anything.

My one real hope is, I've also been dealing with a groin injury...and the shooting pain might actually have been that. I'm not fooling myself here, it really was that area that was giving me trouble the rest of the day. Not a lot to hang my hat on, I know, but...I gotta have a little hope. But I figure about a 75% chance that I do have a disk issue. Of course, I'm a pessimist.

Next stop - MRI-ville!